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What’s a Sex Coach?

When I tell someone that I’m a sex coach, they generally find it confusing. Often, I will hear, “Oh, so like, you’re a sex therapist?” Well not exactly. “So then, what is it that you actually do?”

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What Sexual Empowerment Really Means

We learn to deal with sexuality in deficits. What’s not there. What we don’t have. What we can’t be. What we can’t do. What we need to stay away from. I’d like to swing the lens around 180 degrees and take a look at what we DO want. What we CAN be. What we CAN have. What we CAN do. What types of lovers we CAN draw to us. What experiences we CAN create for ourselves. How we can EXPAND who we are exponentially when we develop, nurture, heal and explore our sexuality.

This week, I want to answer the question, “What does it mean to be a sexually empowered person?”

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“Confidence has nothing to do with sexuality”

Last week I received an email from a woman who was very upset because she had taken my Confidence Types Quiz and she was shocked that there were questions about sexuality on it. Gasp! I get that people might not like Facebook asking questions about sexuality or...

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The Good Girl vs. the Authentic Woman

It’s no secret that women are socialized to take care of everyone else, to question ourselves, and to take a back seat in business, money and sex. As women, being second-class, paid less, experiencing double-standards and being expected to take care of everyone but...

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Unpacking Santa and Consent

I was walking in Pasadena yesterday and happened upon a local holiday fair, with live music, food, lots of people and a good long line to sit on Santa's lap. I walked by the entryway near the line and saw Mrs. Claus sitting in a chair, but no one was sitting on her...

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It’s A Complex Holiday

I am so grateful for the rain that has washed over the west coast. These fires have been devastating to many and sending love to the firefighters who are risking their lives to save lives and homes. I hope you are enjoying your long weekend, however, you are spending...

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How Does Money Relate To Sexuality?

When we evoke the Fire Woman, we mean from the inside. It's been a very sad week in California with the fires raging in our canyons and so many people have lost their homes. I am sending love and tenderness to so many feeling so much loss. This is the "new abnormal"...

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My Birthday, Your Wildness

Last Nov. 9 was my birthday--a much better one than in 2016, the day after the election, possibly one of the most collectively depressing days in recent U.S. history. I'm a words-of-appreciation lover so I do love cards and letters if you feel moved to send me one...

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Releasing Your Sexual Armor

Hope you had a fun, ghoulish Halloween, or celebration of Day of the Dead. It is a time of year when the veils between the worlds are said to be thin and calling on your ancestors can be particularly powerful. I couldn't help myself and I dressed as a sexy patriot, a...

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Two Sexual Abuse Operations Have Just Been Exposed

The Tower is falling. Last week two big organizations ostensibly dedicated to sexual evolution and skills building were brought to their knees. There are a lot of fakes--it's too easy to hang a shingle and call yourself a sex coach, sex educator, tantra practitioner...

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Healing The Good Girl

I feel revived with hope. Before Fire Woman so much shit was smacking the walls, and the horror show of the Kavanaugh hearings was happening. Then I had the joy of spending three days with the perfect group of women who are ready to build something new inside...

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Boys Will Be Boys

Yesterday felt familiar. It felt like the day in 1991 when I was a senior in college at UCSB and I sat watching the confirmation hearings for Clarence Thomas as Anita Hill was interviewed about the ways he had sexually harassed her. The discussions of porn. The pubic...

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I Believe Christine Blasey Ford

At last, women are saying this is enough. Sexual violence will not be ignored or treated as business as usual. We will not stand by and blindly watch a new Supreme Court Justice be confirmed who assaulted a woman, no matter how young he was. That says a lot about who...

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Kitten is My Co-Pilot, San Diego Workshops + We On Fire

Just in case you missed my video this week, I have a new furry friend. You know how the universe provides based on what you're thinking about? Well, my sweet feline companion of 19 years, Pooka, passed away on Friday of Labor Day weekend in 2014 and this year, on...

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What Surfaced From My Dark Night of the Soul

I've been quiet about what's been going on with me lately and I've got to tell you, it has been a dark night of the soul for sure. We all have them. Usually, for me, they happen when I am not doing what I really want to be doing in my life, or not spending my time the...

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